I know I already posted today but as I sit here my hunger is greatly increasing (since i purged my soup - GOD DAMN IT YOUR TEETH WOMAN). I purged the soup because: I only had plans to eat 1.5 servings. I knew if I ate the whole can my sodium intake would be way too high for the day. What do i do? As I am reading about potassium I am sitting there mindlessly eating and I soon hear the "clank" of the spoon against the bowl and realize SHIT I ATE IT ALL. I always do that if I eat soup and read. It's like a work comfort thing its weird. ( I have to have soup when I do in depth reading at my desk......oddddddd)
Anyways back to the point.......I'm worried because my hunger is intense and cravings are HIGH. I almost crumbled this morning over a bag of Doritos but as I was slowly taking my hand off the Gas Station counter top to grab the little fucker below the teller politely said my total for my cigs and I realized I COULD NOT ask her to ring up the Doritos. THANK YOU SO MUCH STRANGE GAS STATION LADY!! You saved my fat ass. But since my cravings are so high and I have been doing well the past few days I am afraid tragedy could strike at any moment this evening. I have cleaning to do around the house so I know it will keep me busy but let's be honest here....I can set the Windex down at any moment and go Ape Shit on the kitchen. UGH. OK, plan of attack is: as soon as I get home eat the cabbage. 2 cups. Maybe even in a binge fashion. As gross as this sounds, when I am binging viciously after restricting for days I eat like a wild beast. Standing in the open fridge eating "silver ware" items with my bare hands....PB, cooked veggies, mac n cheese - whatever is in the damn fridge basically. I am wondering if I stand in the fridge eating cabbage out of the cookware with my hands if it will trick my mind.......Trust me I know how stupid this sounds but I'm totally trying it tonight. Everyone PRAY for me....I will let you know tomorrow if it worked.
Stay Lovely.
Anyways back to the point.......I'm worried because my hunger is intense and cravings are HIGH. I almost crumbled this morning over a bag of Doritos but as I was slowly taking my hand off the Gas Station counter top to grab the little fucker below the teller politely said my total for my cigs and I realized I COULD NOT ask her to ring up the Doritos. THANK YOU SO MUCH STRANGE GAS STATION LADY!! You saved my fat ass. But since my cravings are so high and I have been doing well the past few days I am afraid tragedy could strike at any moment this evening. I have cleaning to do around the house so I know it will keep me busy but let's be honest here....I can set the Windex down at any moment and go Ape Shit on the kitchen. UGH. OK, plan of attack is: as soon as I get home eat the cabbage. 2 cups. Maybe even in a binge fashion. As gross as this sounds, when I am binging viciously after restricting for days I eat like a wild beast. Standing in the open fridge eating "silver ware" items with my bare hands....PB, cooked veggies, mac n cheese - whatever is in the damn fridge basically. I am wondering if I stand in the fridge eating cabbage out of the cookware with my hands if it will trick my mind.......Trust me I know how stupid this sounds but I'm totally trying it tonight. Everyone PRAY for me....I will let you know tomorrow if it worked.
Stay Lovely.
1 comment:
Glad you liked my blog! I'm onto yours now too :) I know what you mean about binging after fasts, it constantly happens to me gaahh. I find if I keep my diet pretty equal every day (maybe a 100 cal difference if that) It keeps me from getting those fucking psycho cravings. So after fasts I would do a couple days gradually returning to what I want to be eating. Annyways I'm rambling. Looking forward to more of your entries! (and yes I will pray for you, to whatever crazy god is in charge of hardcore diets :s) lol
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